Can't Afford Assisted Living - Parents are in Danger

by Marian Bonanno

My parents are 90 and 84.

They live way out in the country by themselves and my sister and I are pulling our hair out on what to do.

They have been taken by neighbors for $5,000. I live 5 hours away. She lives 2 hours away. They REALLY resist any help.

We are afraid to call social services because it is not very good in their area. Recently a druggie who cut their lawn stole my Dad's wallet with $1,300 in it.

What are our options?

They won't let us talk to their Dr. and he doesn't seem concerned. Now, this "druggie" has seen the inside of their home and I'm sure he will be back for more.

We have hired a housekeeper but are worried about that too. We have managed to get most their valuables out except for Mother's jewelry. She just gets too upset when we talk to her about it.

It's only my sister and I to take care of them. We both have disabled children we care for even though we are in our 60's. and I know, if we finally have to make the decision to take them out of the home, that would be the end of my father. I think my Mother, who has dementia, would be relieved.

Any suggestions would be helpful but we have tried everything WE know to do.

There is no money for assisted living. And we don't want them in a state nursing home. We can't visit enough to make sure they are being treated properly.

It is a source of much stress.

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