How to help parents transitioning to Assisted Living

by Kay
(Florida)

My parents are 87 and 88. Mom has dementia. Dad takes care of her but is increasingly frail and now can barely get around with a walker. After much hassles we finally got them to agree to try a two month stay at an Assisted Living. They have been there two days and they are miserable.

They lived in the same house for over 60 years so the move has been awful for them, I guess. None of us live close by, even though we were all home to help them move in, we have all left to get back to our lives. I feel terrible and guilty.

They are SAFE and BEING FED and don't have to clean or do house maintenance, but we have taken away my father's car after his latest accident (ran straight into a log into the road the he didn't see). He is mad and feels his independence is gone. My mother is confused and sad.

For three years I've thought all I want is to get them into assisted living and now that they are I feel horrible.

Please help me process this. Will they adjust? Will I adjust? Is this typical?